my guilty, my sorrow...

What a bad day today, and i just want to take a quick glance on the christmas tree with her, but,...what have i done. Such a terrible attitude of me. Sorry deeply in my heart,...im sorry!=( however, i still bring her out to zhong hua lou for dinner. She ate quite a lot! That balacan! Waaaa,....seldom see girl love lasak punya 酱！OMG!! hahaha!! but, she is unique,...very unique,....yes, and i still love her, deep deep inside my heart. And im kinda weird@@ Argh!!! Anyway, thanks for her smile again. Something behind the stone i think,...herm,....Well, i will go and ask her someday. And im sorry again, if i hurt you today. Sorry...

什么样的心情。。。

好伤，好伤。。。从来就没有这样的伤心过。谁会懂，谁会知？没有一个人。只有自己咽下这股伤感。要好好休养自己。。。我会这样锻炼我自己。可是，感觉，就好象在欺骗自己。原来，我太过单纯，以为找到真爱，可换来的，只是，朋友吗？为什么，为什么，。。。我做错了什么，告诉我，请你告诉我！！！

朋友比较重要。。。呵呵。。。以前，你就这样赖我，说我，说我把朋友排第一。那时候，就根本不知含情。如今，我才知道，了解，什么叫，把朋友排第一。我好笨，好傻。。。伤我好深，你知道吗？你知道吗？？？！！！！！！你的答案，不知道，就是无声。。。

爱上一个把我当朋友的人，真的真的，好傻。难道，我就这样一辈子。。。吗？不会，我相信，会有一个很爱我的女生。可是。。。不懂怎么形容。会是你吗？？？？？？

我在渴望什么？ 你的爱。你的真心。很难吗？除非，你对我死心，淡了。请你告诉我，这会让我觉得很丢脸，还死赖着你，很丢脸。。。我是男生，为什么会这样子？为什么？？？？！！！！

你说我喜欢你，是现在而已。呵呵。。。就是不相信。。。好，那么，就去学着说谎，到处骗人，骗女生！。。。我不是一个好孩子，很坏，很坏的。说我好，是在称赞我吗？。这世界，有很多个好人。。。而，我这好人，就是容易被欺负。。。。。。。

坦白的对我好吗？ 请你坦白的。对我死心了，就告诉我，我会，慢慢离开你，远离你，不会再这样烦着你。我答应你，毕竟，可能，我可能对你不好了，我对你不懂要怎么表达我的爱。表达能力，真的很差。。。

这就回去，找出我真的想要的答案了。很快，很快了。。。请你全部告诉我！！！不要再这样继续伤害我，知道吗？？！！！！你的答案，将会改变一切，真的，请你相信我。就当你以前都不相信我，可是，这次的相信，你会明白。

这些话，先说在前，我，。。还是爱你，喜欢你，直到，我等到我要的答案，一切，将会改变。。。。宝贝。。。。。，不要让我失望。。。

怕你多情，我的心情也不定下来。我相信你。你要好好爱自己，知道吗？一万万句对不起，离开你是不得已。真的真的很不愿意，又让你哭泣，让你伤心。我会回来看你，宝贝，。。。还能叫你宝贝，我很开心，是我的荣幸，我会珍惜你这宝贝。。。

So damn miss my honey.

Honey, i see the video you play "xiao mi fen"...i really miss you very much. Im sad in heart. Truely, heartly, deeply.. I cant attend your birthday party, really down. Im here, would like to apologize to you. I will treat you if im back=) i promise.=) you are the only one i love the most. Now i know who i love now, hope you will do the same things to me, same feeling to me. Promise me... I will try to calm down myself. And sometimes, Ah yew is crazy when i bad mood there, bang the door loudly. Im sure, he is scared by me. haha!

And i know you play frisbee! =) thanks god that my honey is happy also in her birthday. Thank you very much. Almost every night, i dreamed on you too. You are so good to me in the dream, and sometimes, you angry me. Sure i will sad when i wake up. Honey, ah seng has many things to tell you. Many many questions want to ask you too. I will wait after your exam. I will....

A pig Day

And i was awaken by mum in the morning. Heard from my Aunty tat pajero's tyres pancit le. Asked me change it. == Haiz.. mafan. Dey ar....dun noe wat to say, how to say. All my hands and t shirt black after tat. And the locked key make my life so difficult. lolz

In the afternoon, i suppose to go village with mum. But i asked my sister go. Lazy day. Haha=b But i need to bring my mei mei to tuition. And i sleep jor in the car at traffic light thr. wow!

Thanks for somebody caring. haha=b Sori for her lor. Din message or reply her when she needs help. Im not good...sleeping there. And i cant sleep ler. Start from 5pm sleep till 10pm...haha! She sleeps ler ba? Indeed. Dont know wat she wans sometimes coz im stupid.@@ No reply me. So small heart also sometimes. blekkk~Zen yang? lai da wo lo~ wakaka=b Good nitez ba. Will try to force myself to sleep after tat. sniff sniff.

Angry!

My fren, Jackson is leaving us today. We mange to give him a shock b4 he leaves us. lolz He wears til smart smart. haha...When will be my turns? I wondering, she bu de frens here sometimes when thinking, and someone i like jor. No no no!!! Yes yes yes!!! hahaha! miserable again.

Jus tell her i like her d. Ngai.....dont k le. As my fren says, Jackson, "say nia, dare to like dare to say!" haha! XXXXXXXDDDDDD sure need to responsible for words given. And i told her le how i gona to responsible. haha!

And i look for Global today. She tells me the VISA stuff. Probably i will out to KL make my VISA. Easy job one, jus the thumb scanning.== It is just available from 21 of June. i mean the date to make VISA. And planning to out on 15 of September! HAHAHA!! PORTSMOUTH im coming!

And im ngry! She has time to reply msg at fb, wait so long jus reply me short short! At message box thr pula! appear offline and appear offline again at fb! NGRY!! Cia me ice cream to cool me down if u see dao this message ba! HAHAHAHA!!!

Rasa Sayang and rasa sayang for jackson farewell =b

Damn bored today in the office. No people around. Alone in the office. Just a tauke of the site talk to me. I was surprise tat his daughter also study in UK. Lolz. Then we have a topic to chat with.

Noon time, i appoint KL out. Hahaha=b She is so funny sometimes. Ask her things she dun wan answer one. Make me so excited there. She seems like to see me excited there. Make my heart gatal gatal...Waiha!! lolz. We went to Rasa Sayang.

I order kampua which i like and love the most. Haha=b and she order Laksa...also nice ler. A few minutes ago, we saw our KLT frenz. Walao! hahaha=b so ngam ngam one! Lol. Li Xuan and Khim dem! Lolz... Ngai lor KL. Ahahaha=b And her mum's brother also at there. Woohoooo....xuan xi lin meng. hiak hiak hiak=b she how she reacts to her mum ler. hehhe=b make me so happy thr. heahahahhaxb

Around 5pm, we meet Jackson Chiong, Ker Li's relative ba. Far away de relative. but nice ler them. Hoho..good.=b And also meet with Xiao wei and Xiao Yun. They gifted Jackson a formal shirt. All the best to him baa. lolz take care frenz.

Wat a "lucky" Day!

Damn! And i hate being talk and misread by someone! Today, im all alone in the office. Do this and that...Wakaka! Superman yo! Thinkin of wana relax more after work by playing badminton,...

Who noe... a drunken security! In-nonsense one! Walao!! Make me wana beat him k him!!! Hng! So so so ngry!!! Wat a irresponsible security! Say he nvr see my pajero! QSE9168!! I will make u familiar with it one day! Trust me!! Hahaha!! And someone blocked me from stir up with him! Thanks a lot ler. Orelse maybe i will sentence in jail. haha...maybe...haiz....wat i own ppl actually. Alwas me kena Toto....hahhaa!!

And she ar, quite funny le. Wear 隐形眼镜 and say tat the moon is blur blur one. stupiak..=b but it is really blur becoz of cloud la. hahaha=b Sha po......

And i need to learn to be patient. Orelse, many trouble i will involve in. Who will control me if i oversea somedays? i wonder.... Bah!!!! Patient patient patient!!!!!